I’m finally out of that cavern. Took me long enough! Anyway, let me first explain a few things about the mail system. Any time I make a ritual for mail that I send to you, I get a tracking number, which I can then use to see if you’ve received my letters. I’m telling you this to clarify some stuff I told you last week: time seems to pass very differently ever since I came into the Plains of Angst and Sorrow. The interval between my last two letters should have been of several months, yet, apparently, there was only a week in between for you. I also noticed that there were two months between the reception of the letter about the government. From what I’ve calculated, if time keeps bending, you will receive this letter before I send it!
Anyway, remember how I went to the cave a couple of months back? It was very nice of the bear to show me that shortcut, and I really thanked him. I think he was pretty moved, because he then extended his long sharp claws and tried to give me a surprise hug in the darkness. However, the floor was pretty slippery, and I was a bit taken aback by the suddenness of the whole thing, so I fell back. The bear advanced towards me, but it was so dark in there that he tripped and fell, with the extremely bad luck of meeting a stalagmite, which wasn’t supposed to be sharp. But the bear’s eye and a part of its brain were crossed by the rock, fatally injuring him.
The bear obviously panicked, and almost mauled my arm while I was trying to free him from the rock. I think the brain damage must have been quite severe, because he started talking about murdering me and my whole family, even when I helped him lie down on the floor, his arms weakly flailing towards me. I used a calming spell to make his last few moments more bearable (pun not intended), and then gave him a proper funeral service.
Of course, the problem with all of these things was that I was in the middle of a dark cave with a dead guide, so getting out of there was quite a challenge. Luckily, after many days of walking in the darkness I found some gorgeous murals that glowed with strange characters and figures that moved in every direction. I followed the moving men and women from the walls, and got to a dead end. I looked around, and saw that it was a room full with bones and skulls ordered neatly. It looked fairly similar to my own bedroom in the headquarters of the Illuminati, and I was glad that they offered a place for sleeping the night. I do have to say, there are some really nice people here, I don’t know why they would call it the Plains of Angst and Sorrow.
The next morning, the figures were impatiently looking at me from the wall. Apparently, I hadn’t noticed a sacrificial dagger that had been lit when I arrived at the chamber (so that was that light that had disturbed my sleep!). It looked quite dusty, and was full of cobwebs, so, trying to be a polite guest, I cleaned the place up to leave it in a better shape than when I had arrived here. Not to be arrogant, but I have to say that I did quite a good job about it. I even managed to clean some dirty marks from the floors, along with some blood marks in their centre. Apparently, the previous guest was rude enough to leave a blood mark in there.
Anyway, the moment I did that, the fiery figures from the walls started to scream. I think they were cheering for me, and thanking me for my help. They started to do some weird dance, frantically moving around, moving their arms up and down. But I had to fully clean it, so I kept scrubbing until all of the marks were gone. At that moment, the figures disappeared, and, for some reason, the cave started to collapse. Using a protective spell, I managed to navigate my way up and out of the cavern, but I think the figurines didn’t make it.
A figure with the skull of a ram then sentenced that “A civilization had been lost in that cavern”. It took me a bit, but then I recognized the thing! It was the one that appeared some months ago, when your letter turned into this forest! It started to walk away from me, but I decided to follow it. Let’s hope it can give me directions to the headquarters of the Freemasons!
Give my regards to mom and dad.