Induction

Dear Vera,

I hope that you received my previous letter. I haven’t received any direct response from you, so I was wondering if there is something wrong with the mail system here. I mean, it’s a bit unorthodox: you have to write your letter in a weird red ink that smells kind of funny, almost as if it had been harvested from a recently sacrificed animal, and then seal it with a demonic pentagram seal. When I did this I lost consciousness, and the next thing I remember I was cleaning a sacrificial knife in an altar that I had not seen before. The letter had disappeared, and my tutor informed me that it had been sent to its destination. Weird, I don’t remember adding a stamp onto the envelope.

Anyway, last week I told you that I was studying hard to pass an entrance exam and that I would hopefully be inducted into the Illuminati this week. I had prepared myself to impress the examiners, and during practice hours I even managed to summon the Behemoth once more, thinking that I was going to impress my Summon examiner and pass that exam with flying colours. I needed to get a good mark in that to compensate for the lower mark that I knew that I was going to get in my Brainwashing exam (I mean, come on! There are so many herbs, potions and mind techniques to learn in that subject that it’s impossible to learn them all!).

I did great at the Marketing and Business related subjects, and I was satisfied with my Revised History and Dark runes responses. They went quite well, and I think I did better than the other candidates in those subjects. However, the second to last exam was Brainwashing, and it was an extremely tiring five-hour exam (which I somehow managed to pass). By the time I got to my Summon examination, I was exhausted, and I kind of messed this one up.

I did all of the basic summons just fine, minor demons and weak fairies are quite easy to call into the human realm, and they don’t require elaborate magic pentagrams to materialize and act on the world. The last question was just to summon whatever I felt like summoning, so I tried to summon the Behemoth once more. The problem was that, due to my tiredness, I was kind of sloppy, and I mixed up the coordinates of the plane of existence in which the Behemoth is usually contained, resulting in opening up a portal to a plane of pure void.

Everything and everyone around me started to get sucked into the vacuum, and the rest of candidates and half of the examiners were sucked in, too. When I finally managed to close the portal, the examiners that were left looked at me, raised their shoulders and decided to accept me, because there was nobody else left to compete against me. I felt extremely ashamed, because I had not managed to summon the Behemoth, and the examiners looked sort of neutral? Disappointed? I couldn’t really read their literally faceless expressions. I apologized twice, trying to explain that I had intended to summon the Behemoth, but they just said that it was OK.

That night, I was taken to a meeting point in a garden. There were hundreds of people there, watching from under their dark cloaks, some of them hissing, and their scales only partially visible under the light of a large fire that shone bright in the middle of the darkest night that I had ever seen. I was given my internship contract, which I read and signed. A dark priestess (probably just someone from HR) threw the contract into the fire, which became the brightest black I’ve ever seen, illuminating the night with its blackness, and then it turned into the darkest white, darkening the night even further. The fire then turned red once more, and a dark cloak came out of it. The dark priestess placed the cloak on my shoulders, and welcomed me to the Illuminati.

I’ve been told that I’m going to start working on Monday, I’m so excited! I hope everyone is doing fine at home. Give them my regards. Lots of love,

Jan

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